December 9, 2011

never lose the wonder.

I confess, I've been neglecting this blog.  Really, I've been neglecting my time with Him.  It seems so much easier to go about my day and keep myself busy with projects rather than turn to the only One who can offer healing.  With each day, He offers me new mercies anyway, and reveals Himself in ways I never expect.  I feel so unworthy, but He sees me as gold.

Let me share something with you that He has taught me this week.  My almost two-year-old son recently learned the word "Almighty" from listening to a Third Day worship song.  My husband and I were impressed, and immediately encouraged him to also say "Jesus."  Let me tell you, whenever my son says the name of Jesus, his face lights up.  His countenance changes and it's like he KNOWS he's talking about Someone who's just wonderful.  Even though he's young and still doesn't have all of the knowledge yet, I really think God has already placed the wonder of all that He is in my toddler's heart.

It reminds me of that scene in The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe when the Pevensie children have all entered Narnia and are sitting down with the Beavers.  Mr. Beaver tells them that Aslan is on the move, and immediately the atmosphere in the room seems to change.

"And now a very curious thing happened.  None of the children knew who Aslan was any more than you do; but the moment the Beaver had spoken these words everyone felt quite different.  Perhaps it has sometimes happened to you in a dream that someone says something which you don't understand but in the dream it feels as if it had some enormous meaning -- either a terrifying one which turns the whole dream into a nightmare or else a lovely meaning too lovely to put into words, which makes the dream so beautiful that you remember it all your life and are always wishing you could get into that dream again.  It was like that now.  At the name of Aslan each one of the children felt something jump in its inside.  Edmund felt a sensation of mysterious horror.  Peter felt suddenly brave and adventurous.  Susan felt as if some delicious smell or some delightful strain of music had just floated by her.  And Lucy got the feeling you have when you wake up in the morning and realize that it is the beginning of the holidays or the beginning of summer."

I have to confess, this is one of my favorite passages in the whole Narnia series.  And the movie adaptation does a great job at conveying what C.S. Lewis was describing here.  At the name of Aslan, you see the expressions of the children's faces drastically change, as if they had just heard something very profound and life-changing, and each of them conveying it in a different way.

It might be a stretch, but when I see my young son's face light up when he speaks the name of Jesus, I like to think that perhaps he is also feeling as if a delightful strain of music is floating by.  Or maybe he's feeling more brave and adventurous.  Or maybe he's feeling something totally unique that he couldn't describe even if he had the ability to tell me.  I'm just excited that he's already open to the wonder of all that Jesus is.  And when he's old enough to learn about how Jesus walked the earth and died for our sins so that he could have a relationship with Him for all eternity, I'm hoping it'll just be more pieces to the puzzle snapping into place.  How amazing that will be.

I hate to admit it, but it turns out you can learn something from your kid.  Am I allowing the wonder of Jesus into my life?  I want to get to the point where even the mention of his name changes my face as well as the atmosphere in the room.  Thank You Lord for teaching me and loving me even when I don't find the time to crack open my Bible.  Show me more of Your wonder.